Ken Hidaka (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
hatesthefood) wrote2010-05-20 09:21 am
hatesthefood) wrote2010-05-20 09:21 am
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I'm beginning to lose track of time here. That's a dangerous thing. Maybe it's because I can't keep myself as grounded now. I feel restless all the time. Even when I was in prison, I never felt like this. This trapped. There was reason for that, but there isn't for this. Being with Aya in England helped me to balance things. Being with Mamoru here did the same thing, even if things were strained sometimes. It still kept me from slipping like I had before.
The nightmares stopped for a while, thankfully, but now, I have them every other night or so, and I'm starting to worry that they'll end up affecting me. I still can't remember how I died, but in my dreams... so much pain... and flesh being torn away, but when I wake up reaching for them, there's no one to kill.
I'm afraid of the madness. What if it happens again? There's no one here to stop me again... -door chime ringing, then a click-
Ken waved to the customer leaving the store, calling out a parting farewell before he glances around the store again. While it was quiet thanks to him telling Umi to take a few days off, he almost missed the cheery chatter she provided. While he wasn't exactly alone, thanks to the attentive dog almost always at his side these days, he always seemed to hold himself seperate from others. Still, he always had a smile for those he spoke to or passed by, and only those that truly knew him well know those smiles were a little hollow.
Seeing no one else in the store, he padded back towards the scarred up table in the workroom he used to do arrangements, eager to find something to do to keep his hands busy.
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[Smiling, he leans back to peer lazily at her.]
We lost someone recently, but thankfully, SA hasn't been too busy. Granted, that can change pretty quickly, but for now, not so bad. Being in charge of it makes a ton of paperwork for me and all, but I can do a lot of it at home, so I promise I'm getting at least six hours sleep a night.
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[It doesn't sound too much like a question, more like a safe bet. But Umi can't be sure. Really, crowds of people are leaving lately.]
He's Syaoran's good friend. I think Syaoran's feeling his absence more than anyone.
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...Don't forget I live next door: I'll NOTICE if you're up and about at weird hours.
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I know. That's part of the reason I made him take a few days off. I know he's still not resting, though.
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[Now there's concern in her voice. If Ken's her older brother figure, Syaoran is definitely the little one she feels responsible for, after a fashion. Nevermind the boy's actually a couple of years older than she is.]
Syaoran's the type to go out of his way to help others, but...
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And I can understand that. Far as I know? Mister Fai and Mister Kurogane are like family to him. Same goes for their Mokona...
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It's never easy to lose family, but I don't want him to do what I would end up doing. Keeping busy is one thing, but working yourself sick isn't gonna work.